Tom: Now this is a short segment where I like to inform you about simple things that not many ponies take time to notice. The first thing being we all have something in common, and that is...we're all here in Neigh Jersey.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: At an auditorium. In a high school.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: You ever wonder why Manehattan always gets so much praise?! It's a fucking dump!
Crowd: *Cheering, and laughing*
Tom: It's a cesspool of littering, rape, and traffic jams!
Crowd: *Laughing, and clapping*
Tom: There might be a few good landmarks here and there, but you have to wait 3 hours for 70 cars to get out of your way!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Manehattan, or as it's commonly referred to as Neigh York City, is overcrowded, and overrated! The one good thing I like is that every time I see the Statue Of Liberty, I remember it is actually located in Neigh Jersey. Not Neigh York.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: And everyone refers to it as a symbol of hope. For all the ponies stuck in the concrete jungle, that you still have an opportunity for a better future, west of the Hudson River!
Crowd: *Clapping, and cheering*
Tom: Or if you prefer to stay on the east side, go at least ten miles north upstate.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: Have you ever noticed that there's no Koreans named Dustin?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: A colt misheard me last time I said that joke, and thought I said Justin, but I bet you there's no Koreans with that name either.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: A few more will arrive after this quick two second break.
Tom took a sip of water before he continued.
Tom: Don't you find it weird that British ponies are always referred to as polite? But when you see one in person, they always treat you like crap, simply because you're not one of them.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: And it's not just us Equestrians. They also despise the French, Germans, Australians, even some of their neighbors in nearby Scotland, and Ireland!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: It makes you wonder how they're raised when growing up! Then you look at a lot of them, and realize some of them aren't that bright. They go around pretending to know what they're doing. Pretending they're better. They talk the talk, but they can't walk the walk.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Another thing I like to think about that not many others bring up are the lyrics to Ta-Ra-Ra Boom-De-Ay.
Crowd: *Laughing, and whistling*
Tom: That's literally all they say. Ta-Ra-Ra Boom-De-Ay, Ta-Ra-Ra Boom-De-Ay.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: You hear it in the Aristocats for a short second, but that's it. I bet it goes something like this. Ta-Ra-Ra Boom-De-Ay. Did you get yours today? I got mine yesterday. That's why I walk this way.
Crowd: *Cheering, and clapping*
Tom: And don't you just hate, when somepony does the wrong thing, and gets away with it? Especially if it's something that usually gets them in trouble with the police!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Then instead of doing their job, they lecture you about loitering!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Instead of stopping ponies from loitering, why don't you stop them from littering?!?!
Crowd: *Laughing, and clapping*
2 B Continued
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: At an auditorium. In a high school.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: You ever wonder why Manehattan always gets so much praise?! It's a fucking dump!
Crowd: *Cheering, and laughing*
Tom: It's a cesspool of littering, rape, and traffic jams!
Crowd: *Laughing, and clapping*
Tom: There might be a few good landmarks here and there, but you have to wait 3 hours for 70 cars to get out of your way!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Manehattan, or as it's commonly referred to as Neigh York City, is overcrowded, and overrated! The one good thing I like is that every time I see the Statue Of Liberty, I remember it is actually located in Neigh Jersey. Not Neigh York.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: And everyone refers to it as a symbol of hope. For all the ponies stuck in the concrete jungle, that you still have an opportunity for a better future, west of the Hudson River!
Crowd: *Clapping, and cheering*
Tom: Or if you prefer to stay on the east side, go at least ten miles north upstate.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: Have you ever noticed that there's no Koreans named Dustin?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: A colt misheard me last time I said that joke, and thought I said Justin, but I bet you there's no Koreans with that name either.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: A few more will arrive after this quick two second break.
Tom took a sip of water before he continued.
Tom: Don't you find it weird that British ponies are always referred to as polite? But when you see one in person, they always treat you like crap, simply because you're not one of them.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: And it's not just us Equestrians. They also despise the French, Germans, Australians, even some of their neighbors in nearby Scotland, and Ireland!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: It makes you wonder how they're raised when growing up! Then you look at a lot of them, and realize some of them aren't that bright. They go around pretending to know what they're doing. Pretending they're better. They talk the talk, but they can't walk the walk.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Another thing I like to think about that not many others bring up are the lyrics to Ta-Ra-Ra Boom-De-Ay.
Crowd: *Laughing, and whistling*
Tom: That's literally all they say. Ta-Ra-Ra Boom-De-Ay, Ta-Ra-Ra Boom-De-Ay.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: You hear it in the Aristocats for a short second, but that's it. I bet it goes something like this. Ta-Ra-Ra Boom-De-Ay. Did you get yours today? I got mine yesterday. That's why I walk this way.
Crowd: *Cheering, and clapping*
Tom: And don't you just hate, when somepony does the wrong thing, and gets away with it? Especially if it's something that usually gets them in trouble with the police!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Then instead of doing their job, they lecture you about loitering!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Instead of stopping ponies from loitering, why don't you stop them from littering?!?!
Crowd: *Laughing, and clapping*
2 B Continued
so here are a few theories i got for this show:
Theory #1: since Hasbro and DHX never even bothered to give Cozy Glow any semblance of a backstory, my theory is that she's actually a fully-grown adult pony stuck inside a filly's body. she was born with a condition that never let her physically age after filly-hood.
Theory #2: while we do know Sunset used to be Celestia's top student, i always thought there was something more to it than just a teacher-student relationship. and since we never get to see if Sunset had parents at some point in time, my theory is that she's Celestia's adopted daughter. remember how worried Celestia was about Sunset at the end of the first EqG movie? yeah, something tells me they're more than just teacher and ex-student.
Theory #3: at one point in time, King Sombra used to be a great and loved king, before he became corrupted by his desire for power that forced Celestia and Luna to banish him into the abyss.
Theory #1: since Hasbro and DHX never even bothered to give Cozy Glow any semblance of a backstory, my theory is that she's actually a fully-grown adult pony stuck inside a filly's body. she was born with a condition that never let her physically age after filly-hood.
Theory #2: while we do know Sunset used to be Celestia's top student, i always thought there was something more to it than just a teacher-student relationship. and since we never get to see if Sunset had parents at some point in time, my theory is that she's Celestia's adopted daughter. remember how worried Celestia was about Sunset at the end of the first EqG movie? yeah, something tells me they're more than just teacher and ex-student.
Theory #3: at one point in time, King Sombra used to be a great and loved king, before he became corrupted by his desire for power that forced Celestia and Luna to banish him into the abyss.